Happy Holidays!

We would like to take this opportunity to show our appreciation to the many friends, family members and venues that have and continue to support us because if you’re reading this you are undoubtedly one of the three. We are honored to still have the opportunity to perform after all these years and you make that happen. This has been a challenging year but thanks to you we remain in a position to continue to provide the peculiar type of entertainment you’ve come to know as The Worst Band You’ll Ever Love well into the foreseeable future. Wishing nothing but the best for you and yours not just during the holiday season but throughout the coming year as well...

The Absolute Blue Family

Bill, Don, Kevin, Skip, Tom, Rene, David and Paul

Absolute Blue Invitation - 12/20/19 - 12/21/19

Absolute Blue Holidizes

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the House, not a creature was stirring not even a mouse.

But then in the Senate I thought I saw there, a mythical creature, the one with orange hair.

I looked a bit closer and saw all the Trumps, but something was wrong, they seemed down in the dumps.

Before them lay piles of old candy bars, some Three Musketeers, M&M’s and some Mars.

He spoke as he casually reached for the sweets. “Don’t they read my postings, don’t they read my tweets?”

“It should have been me on the front page of Time, not some little girl, that cover was mine.”

“My talking is perfect, my brain, well, it’s brilliant. Have you ever met someone that’s quite so resilient?”

“Yes it’s the movies, where she should have been, while I make America great once again.”

Then Nancy Pelosi came on the TV. He jumped into action, at first startling me.

“On Rudy, on Lindsey, on Orrin and Mitch. On Devin, on Ronny (that son of a bitch).”

“They think that we’ll take this while sitting? As if! I’ll tweet my response, I don’t give a Schiff.”

And then I could see he was not so much bitter, when constantly ranting and raving on Twitter.

With things back to normal I slipped out the back and headed for what should be some fries and Big Mac.

And then as I left, he said with a scoff “Merry Christmas non Trumpers, and then just eff off.”

Join us for a Saturday at Sunset Waterfront Grill in Cocoa Beach, on 520 at the river, from 5 to 10…

Absolute Blue Invitation 12/06/19 - 12/07/19

Absolute Blue Vegetizes

In an effort to drain the last bit of value from our health plan this year, as well as take advantage of a Groupon, we collectively went to the doctor last week and after a cursory exam we were told the only thing that would alleviate our many and varied ailments was more roughage. So Don punched Kevin, Kevin kicked Tom, Tom slapped Skip, Skip whacked Bill and Bill smacked Don, while the doctor watched in amazement. Turns out we just needed to get more fiber. He gave us two options, either a suppository, which we googled and, well, no. Or to eat more vegetables. This seemed much less invasive, but we didn’t want to settle for the simple joy of Bok Choy or the gender insensitive Chickpea. So we each developed our own unique recipe which represents our own personality and cultural heritage and also conforms to our own culinary program we like to call Make America Grate Again, which is sure to put the itch back in spinach:

-Pucumbers: Laced with croton oil, this potent purgative has been a staple in Kevin’s family for generations. Guaranteed to spew the stew, hurl the swirl and gag the nag.

-Okra Winfrey: Skip’s most inspiring recipe garnered rave reviews for its texture and presentation. Proudly served to all freedom loving Americans with no apologies.

-Sasquash: Based on the zucchini of mythical proportions, this seldom seen and rarely photographed dish is a favorite of Bill’s although he never remembers ever having it. Most probably more urban legend than food.

-Below Parsnips: Tom’s underachieving dish strives for mediocrity then fails miserably. Similar in experience to chewing a used damp sweat sock only without the nutritional value.

-Swiss Charred: Culinary history was made when Don mistakenly burned some of that cheese with the holes in it.

Join us for a Friday night at Sunset Waterfront Grill and Bar in Cocoa Beach, on 520 at the river, from 5 to 10…

Then Saturday it’s the Tiki in Sebastian, on Indian River just south of Main Street, from 7 to 11…