FORMER SLOGANS OF ABSOLUTE BLUE

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  Absolute Blue - Where Even Ugly Guys Have A Chance

  Brought To You By Salmonella - The Other Anthrax

  The Worst Band You'll Ever Love

  Playing All The Music You Never Thought You'd Have To Hear

  Absolute Blue - At Least They're Not The Groove Monsters

  More Wrong Now Than Ever

  Absolute Blue - An Alternative To Those High Cholestrol Bands

  Serving The Palm Shores Metropolitan Area

  Absolute Blue - If We Can't Play It, It's Probably Too Hard

  Lather/Rinse/Repeat

  Condemned By Fans And Critics Alike

  Favorite Band Of Many Retirement Homes

  Absolute Blue - No, It's Supposed To Be That Loud

  You Know It's Live Because It's Out Of Tune

  Absolute Blue - Better Than Some

  The Band With More Gratitude Than Attitude

  Setting New Standards For Mediocrity

  The Band With More Personality Than Technicality

  Where The Entertainment Is Always At Least This Good

  At The Edge Of Consciousness

  Freshly Squeezed

  Is It Me, Is It You, Something Smells Like Ballyhoo