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Absolute Blue Invitation 11/10/17 - 11/12/17

 

Absolute Blue Pecunisizes

 

Back in the day our fiscal strategies began and ended with our limited edition collector’s trading cards, which we feel even now has proven to be a wise investment as the Bill Yearty rookie card from 1996 fetches upwards of $3.50 and the infamous Kevin Trowbridge card with the gender misprint can go for as much as $4.23. Sure, you may say this is a speculative failure, however we prefer to say this venture is not yet fully realized, simply awaiting global demand to catch up. At least we have our beanie babies collection to fall back on. And when we were told that due to some accounting discrepancies on these purchases, we were being investigated by the SEC, we paid it no mind as we are Big 10 fans. You know the feeling. When Broker refers more to your financial status than your investment professional. When your Portfolio is headed more starboard. When you realize you can’t spell irate without an IRA. To alleviate some of your burden we are proud to bring you the following selections, whether you’re looking to invest, untie or simply get back into that old suit:

 

-The fourth installment of our infotainment series, ‘Know Your Yescrow!’.

-Our Hedge fund now includes bushes and shrubbery options.

-Not only do we offer Mutual Bonding, for a small additional fee Don will provide spooning as well.

-Adding to our 401(k) Rollover service, we add 401(k) Heel, 401(k) Sit and 401(k) Who’s A Good Fund?

-Since we were told to invest in Bonds, we most recently added Goldfinger and Casino Royale.

-Increased our leverage by investing in crowbars and seesaws.

-We now provide a series of low liability accounts, thereby creating a Den of Equity.

 

 

Join us this weekend for our return to the Tiki Bar in Sebastian, just south of Main Street on Indian River Boulevard from 7 to 11…

 

And Saturday it’s the Sand Bar in Cocoa Beach, at the end of 520, from 9 to 1…

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