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Absolute Blue Invitation 12/16/16 - 12/17/16
Absolute Blue Nauticalizes
We demand a recount. After all, are we to take someone's word and accept that as the final truth? Enough with the rhetoric, we want proof! I mean, with us on the Naughty list again it rivals Guns 'n Roses current steak. How come Santa gets to make the call? Shouldn’t there be checks and/or balances? Why can’t we be grading on a curve? We see a lot of other bands getting what they want for Christmas. And when does the evaluation period start anyway? We always figured it began on the first of the year so we have a 'free' week after Christmas, kind of like in The Purge. And what about an appeal process? We could put our crack team of lawyers on it, or more appropriately our team of crack lawyers. We put a lot of time and effort to turn things around and through the years we have even gone so far as to document, record and notarize the following to ensure our transition to 'Nice':
-Back on his Navy days, Kevin turned a weeklong furlough into a torrid affair with what is now known as Yuletide Carol. See also New Years Nancy and Arbor Day Annie.
-Skip has donated many slightly worn jeans and classic rock shirts so we believe we have Goodwill Toward Men covered. And some women.
-Bill has perfected his paradiddle which has solidified his current status as Little Drummer Boy of Satellite Beach. Parumpapapa, bitches.
-Don still has his Gay Apparel, mostly leftover from that Halloween we dressed up as the Village People.
-Tom wears clean underwear most of the time.
Yes, as fate would have it, Tom's underwear are in fact notarized.
This weekend we bring you a doubleheader at Keith’s Oyster Bar at Cocoa Beach Pier from 6 to 10 Friday and Saturday…
Absolute Blue Invitation 11/17/16 - 11/19/16
Absolute Blue Givesthanking
So it was late and we were about out of options. We had run through just about every place we could think of. What with the tabasco fiasco at Chili’s, the melee at Chick-fil-A, the fling at Burger King, the funkin at Dunkin’, the hassle at White Castle, the scrape at Steak n Shake, the fray at Chipotle and the many rows at Domino’s we couldn’t find a place that would have us for Thanksgiving. We were acting peculiar at the brand new Carl’s Jr, had too many parties at Wendy’s and Hardy’s, crashed the computers at our local Hooters and were unable to get a pardon for that time at Olive Garden. So imagine our surprise when the Yearty’s invited us over, provided we brought a dish to share! We were so thrilled that we penned the following to commemorate the event:
Over the river and with canned goods
To old Billy’s house we go
There’s no way to say what we’ll bring that day
It could be some Twinkies and Ho Ho’s
Might bring some liver through neighborhoods
Where we never thought we’d be
To eat with the few who like Absolute Blue
So it might be just you and me
An early holiday presentation for us as we have just one performance before then, which is this Thursday at The Avenue in Viera, from 6 to 9. We’ll be in the middle of the Quad, conveniently next to World Of Beer…
Absolute Blue Invitation 11/11/16 - 11/13/16
Absolute Blue Projects
The votes have been counted and the results are in. It may not be what we expected but one must have faith in the system that has been put in place specifically for this purpose. Believe us, next time it will be different. At this point there is nothing to do but accept what is before us and move on as best we can. Sure, we can debate on many different levels how we got here, the internal logic that determined the course of the events or the actual strategy invoked, but those that are in disagreement need only wait until next time. We at Absolute Blue could take issue with a number of aspects but will remain steadfast. After all, Michigan at number 3 when they clearly have a strong case for 2 and Ohio State being shut out when the selection committee make a clear case for strength of schedule over record for non-ranked opponents? Boggles the mind…
It’s a double header at Keith’s Oyster Bar at Cocoa Beach Pier Friday and Saturday 6-10…
Then it’s our last SBI of the year, Sunday 1-5…
Absolute Blue Invitation 11/04/16 - 11/06/16
Absolute Blue Politicizes
This week we take on the subject that everyone’s talking about. But it will be the last time we mention this again. At least until next week. Of course we speak of the historical event that is imminent and will affect us all for years to come. But we have heard so much about it we don’t know what to think, resulting in what in only be called electile dysfunction. There are tuition hikes for the Electoral College. There is even an effort to redistrict farm land known as Dairymandering. Even the Jewish faithful have agreed in part to be rabbipartisan. The NRA is counting on the bullet ballot for their support which really puts the pain in campaign. It's not only a lame duck it's the same duck, when what we’re really looking for is a caucus that will rock us. Once again it’s the consistent constituency against the redundant incumbent. There is so much negativity between the participants that we call them Can’tidates. I mean, there is so much emphasis on the Poles, but what about the Lithuanians and Czechoslovakians? So say we as the infuriated unaffiliated…
This week we can be found at Squid Lips in Melbourne from 7 to 11 Friday…
Then Saturday, we take the stage at Siggy’s in Palm Bay from 9:30 to 1:30….
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