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Absolute Blue Invitation 10/19/12 - 10/20/12
Absolute Blue Debates
Many fail to realize that immediately prior to the televised debates, a lesser known debate designed to prepare the audience and give the moderator a feel for how to better interrupt the participants occurs. We were honored to have our own Don and Skip take the podium this week. Let's listen in:
My friend's economic plan will cost taxpayers one million beers over the next four years.
My opponents party wants to take away a women's right to choose her own beer.
Oh yeah, well your jobs plan will result in four million American beers to be shipped overseas.
Their plan will tax all beers the same, domestics and imports.
I won't rest until all beers are pulled out of the Middle East and we get them safely home.
I will address the deficit by never again producing more beer than we Americans can drink.
If elected I will repeal Tequilacare, even though it sounds like fun.
I have binders full of beer.
Yes, but it's all cheap beer.
Why that's Old Milwaukee malarkey.
Dipwit.
Asswad.
The rest is of minimal historic value, but one thing's for sure: both microphones were on.
We return after a week off with a Friday night at Siggy's from 9:30 to 1:30...
Then Saturday we debut at a new venue, the Pineda Inn, from 8 to 12. It's located just a mile north of Pineda Causeway on US1...
Absolute Blue Notification 10/12/12
OK, so we're on vacation this weekend. That doesn't mean you can't start planning now for our return weekend, which features a big Friday night at Siggy's on 10/19 and a new venue, Pineda Inn, on 10/20...
Absolute Blue Invitation 10/05/12 - 10/06/12
Absolute Blue's GPS
Actual recording of Kevin's budget priced voice activated GPS:
Hello and what should I call you today?
It’s me, dumbass.
Where would you like to go today Smee Dumass?
Courthouse.
Fines or incarceration?
Umm…fines.
Smee Dumass, pull out of the driveway.
I know.
Then proceed down the street to the next road.
Yeah, ok..
You’re going too fast Smee Dumass.
No I’m not.
Don’t miss your turn.
I won’t.
(pause)Do you wish you were talking to that slut Siri?
Uh…no
You know she’ll talk to anyone.
No…you’re doing fine.(long pause) Well, I think we’re...
DO YOU THINK WE’RE DONE HERE??
I guess I could sit for a while…
He took a cab home.
You may not need directions but make sure to take advantage of all Absolute Blue has to offer this weekend as we take next weekend off...
Friday night we're at Squid Lips from 7 to 11...
And Saturday it's back to the Old Fish House at the Treasure Coast Marina in Grant from 6 to 10...
Absolute Blue Invitation 9/28/12 - 9/30/12
Absolute Blue Minutes
Sept 26, 2012
Pursuant to Public Notice, Chair Tom Willett convened a regularly meeting of the Absolute Blue Board on Tuesday, Sept 25, 2012 in Billy’s living room. All members were present.
Agenda item ABI #17-12: Revocation of Band Policy 11.3.32(b): No band performance shall take place with 1000 yards of an adult entertainment establishment. ACTION: Move to revoke said policy, seconded and voted unanimously. No discussion.
Agenda item ABI #17-13: Individual Veto Power should be limited to 3 songs per night. ACTION: Move to extend individual veto power to 4, pending unforeseen circumstances and/or jaeger shots. Seconded and considerable debate on Jack vs Jaeger. Motion passed unnoticed.
Report from Beautification Committee: Recommend that no shirt should have more than sixteen different examples of no more than three clearly identified floral species. Also recommended that shorts be banned from all performances except for Don, because he has the legs for it.
Report from Redevelopment Committee: Our application to be the Official Band of the First Zombie Apocalypse has been denied. Apparently Justin Bieber beat us to it. Positions for subsequent Zombie Apocalypses are available, however that will require application resubmission and substantial licensing fees.
All recommendations have been tabled until sobriety.
Meeting was adjourned after several beers.
Respectfully submitted into the Absolute Blue Archives, September 26th, 2012.
Join us for an early evening this Friday from 6 to 9 at The Avenue in Viera. We play at the Central Park, conveniently located behind World Of Beers...
Saturday we are off but join us for the last Sunday of the year at SBI from 2:30 to 6:30...
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