Absolute Blue Invitation 8/16/18 - 8/18/18

Absolute Blue Assures

We at Absolute Blue, in our never ending quest to bring you the latest innovations, original entertainment choices and questionable business practices have done it again. We have partnered with financial experts, renown economists and 2 Hooters girls to develop an ill-conceived yet highly impractical solution to an ongoing problem. How many times have you heard the wrong lyrics to a Lynyrd Skynyrd song, or a wrong note when listening to Chicago that left you confused, anxious or questioning the world we live in and/or your specific place within it? Well now for a small monthly premium and most likely a huge copay, you can simply download our mobile app, answer some basic questions detailing your specific emotional trauma and you could immediately be eligible for pizza coupons, BOGO Chipotle vouchers or rare Pokemon. Call it Insuretainment. Or Entersurance. Whatever. And our supplemental packages can protect you against fart jokes, republican posturing and the occasional flying drumstick.

I know what you’re thinking. We’ve heard this all before. Like that time we presented our term insurance product, Absolute Blue Life and that’s almost what they gave us. Or our equity broking service that in fact left us broke. Or that portfolio management service that went starboard. Or the bitcoin investment that came back to bite us. This time it’s probably different. Or it might be. Maybe. Ok, probably not…

Join us for a highly unusual and suspect Thursday at The Avenue in Viera from 5 to 8…

Friday night is a private function but Saturday it’s back to Brews and Blues, on Pennsylvania just off 192 in beautiful St. Cloud, 7:30 to 11:30…

Absolute Blue Invitation 8/03/18 - 8/04/18

Absolute Blue Drives

This week’s invitation comes to you directly from the Absolute Blue Motor Coach, a refurbished 1972 Winnebago Chieftain towing a ’74 Chevy Vega which seats the entire band as long as Billy occupies the hatchback storage area. This means of transportation allows us to experience the freedom of the open road, the comradery of faithful friends and frequent calls to AAA Vehicle Assistance Hotline (ask for Amy). And gives us time to ponder life’s great mysteries. Where does gravity come from? What happened to Winnie The Pooh’s pants? How can I save 15% or more on car insurance? Sometimes we think too hard, like when we proposed the drive-through Japanese restaurant, Benihonda’s. I frequently ponder such things when driving the Escape (the pina colada car). But really, what if bands were to implement their own automotive designs? We have polled some of our friends and found a lot of interest in the topic, including:

-CaraVan Halen: Cause Eddie needs something reliable to pick up the grandkids.

-Totoyota: Holding the line on innovative design, comfort and affordability. Just not airbags.

-BMW2: Pretentious meets pretentious.

-REO Volkswagen: Riding the storm out thanks to classic German engineering.

-Rolls Royster Cult: Legendary luxury tells you, Don’t fear the speeder.

-Nissantana: Japanese efficiency meets Latino passion in a questionable, combustible combination.

-Suzuki and the Banshees: Austerity with a Post punk attitude.

-Bachman Turner Landrover Drive: Takin care of business in four wheel drive, British style.

Join us for a Friday night at Squidlips in Melbourne from 7 to 11…

Then Saturday it’s Sandbar in Cocoa Beach, at the end of 520, from 4 to 8…

Absolute Blue Invitation 6/29/18 - 7/01/18

Absolute Blue Games

There are certain things from our past that remind us of simpler times. Of time spent together without the daily distractions that we now face. And what better way to start than with some of the games we remember as a kid. And we’re not talking about the Chinese version of a popular new game that Kevin recommended, Cards Against Hunanity or its Republican counterpart, Cards Against Sean Hannity. Or that time when Don misunderstood the concept of Scattergories and showed up in a diaper, or adult undergarment, depends. I know, you’ve heard this before, way back in the day, when we proposed a more adult product line including Well Hungry Hungry Hippos and Dicpictionary. But except for Tom we’ve matured considerably since then. So come on, don’t be a Yahtzee Nazi! It’s time to put down the phone and fully engage for our new line of games suitable for the whole family:

-SkipDough: More than just a card game, it’s a strategy for managing our guitarist’s portfolio, one nickel at a time.

-Donopoly: This replaces the traditional properties such as Boardwalk and Park Place with items found around Don’s neighborhood, like Old Shoe, Beer Can and Squirrel.

-Tominoes: A different take on the tile placing game. It’s not so much Mahjong or Yorjong, it’s Ourjong.

-Billy Putty: Mostly industrial strength spackling and used chewing gum. Avoid contact with skin, eyes, relatives, pets that are pregnant, pets that may become pregnant or pets that are thinking about becoming pregnant.

-Tickle Me Kevin: No. Just don’t.

Join us for a big weekend as these will be our last public performances for a couple weeks…

Friday it’s a highly unusual appearance at Cocoa Beach Squidlips from 5:30 to 9:30…

Then Saturday we return to Brews and Blues in St Cloud, 1122 Pennsylvania Ave, just a block off 192, from 7:30 to 11:30…

And Sunday come on down to Sandbar in Cocoa Beach at the end of 520 from 4 to 8…